I might have actually paid for the
software back in 2003 . . .
To be fair I stole this from git.talk.flame. Those funky buggers. I'll put a mildly amusing quote here:
_____________________________________________________
> > only people with a 'girlfriend' can install linux. it must be like
> > a device driver or a component.
insmod girlfriend.ko
cat /proc/girlfriend > /dev/internet