Club409

There is no old business so we'll move on to the new business.

The Committee on the Acknowledgement of the Salty and Delicious Bottom of the Chex-Mix Bag has finished polishing up their latest motion:

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We of the CASDBCMB (hereafter referred as the Committee) respectfully and saltily submit the following to the C4SSSC (hereafter referred as the Society):

- That the Society acknowledges the bottom of the bag as the most delicious part of the Chex mix bag.

- That not a single salty square inch of any Chex mix bag should remain unlicked once the bulk contents of the bag are consumed. This goes double for the bottom of the bag.

- That hereafter no less than 1/3 of all correspondence should finish with the valediction "Saltily Yours" or some acceptable permutation of said phrase. This includes but is not limited to "Deliciously Yours" "With Salty Regards" "Delicious Wishes" or "My Saltiest to You and Yours."

- That when mankind has been changed to reflect the salty nature of the cosmos any present member of this Committee shall be known by the honorary title "His Saltiness." On less formal occasions "You Old Salt" is an acceptable replacement. Other members of the Society playing a lesser role in this transformation shall receive the honorary "the Delicious" before their name in formal address.

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The motion is hereby placed before the assembly for debate and action.

I for one welcome our new salty overlords.

I don't think you appreciate the seriousness of the situation